You'll always be missed..

Right now, it's 10am in Malaysia - I should be there. I'm sitting at home alone, instructing everyone that I am not to be contacted at this time. I need a moment to mourn; to imagine that I did manage to get that flight last night, that I'm right there, able to say my one last final goodbye to you. I still can't believe you're gone. That I'll never get to see you again.. And it fills my heart with so much regret. I should've made an effort to keep in touch with you. I should have gone to all the things Beatrice invited me to. All these "should have's" going round and round in my mind. I can't even remember when the last time I saw you was, and that makes me feel really pathetic. I couldn't even make it there today to say goodbye.

I want to yell at everyone. I'm mad that I didn't find out earlier. I'm pissed off that the few people who are aware of the memories we've shared didn't let me know when they found out. I called around when I found out, asking if they had heard what happened to you and every single one of them said yes, and that they heard about it on Sunday. I feel like I was the last one to know, and I'm so bitter about it because I could've made it if only I knew earlier.

So I'm stuck sitting here.. saying goodbye to you the only way I can. You probably never knew how significant you were to me, and that would be my fault for I never showed it in any way nor made any effort to maintain our friendship. You struck a chord with me when I first met you. I loved it when you guys used to come to the city or whenever us city people went down to Clayton to visit. I'm really sorry that I never saw much of you after Sean and Ket moved out of Uropa. I wish with all my heart that I had taken the opportunity to get to know you better, but now there's nothing I can say or do to change all that and let you know what you meant to me.

I hope this serves as a reminder for me to appreciate the people who mean something to me. I'll always remember you. I miss you greatly. For the first time ever, I feel your absence and it makes me feel terrible and selfish because I only miss you when you're gone. All this while we were living right in the very same city and it never seemed so important that we never met up. I hope you forgive me, and that you're happy wherever you are. I'll try to be a better friend to Beatrice, if she's willing to let me.

Goodbye, my dear friend. May you rest in peace. I promise I'll come visit you soon. Real soon..

Leong Khai Ron
05/08/1986 - 01/08/2010

The world mourned the day you left it.
It was much too soon.