No turning back

Easter long weekend was a joyyy and then Monday came and highlighted the ending of something I had thought was wonderful. Alas, good things don't last forever and now there's no turning back. Only moving forward. No more rubbish sentimentalities. I keep telling myself I've given up but I know that somewhere deep down inside, I am still always hoping. And then I quell that thought by reminding myself that I've given up and then I'm now on the hunt for something better - something fun and perhaps even short-lived. After two years, I deserve a little bit of fun, no?

Although.. I do like the fact that now, people are starting to talk to ME as a person. I'm acknowledged as me, rather than as somebody's partner. In a way it feels really good. And then I bump into him somewhere and everything doesn't feel so good for that split second. But I walk away smiling as if everything is okay, surrounded by others, and I start feeling good again.

Somehow I know ame dearest won't be too happy to find out all I've been up to while she's away. I hope she'll understand.. and I hope she won't judge. All I want is a little bit of fun to make me happy. Maybe some company too. Especially now that she's away. Even Daryl's not coming back tomorrow as planned. Bullshit sucks *whines*