Thursday, June 30, 2005
Whinyyy
Wah lao ehhh.. Fcuking whiny brat, can? Purposely wan I tell u.. Tell-tale. Eesh.. eh i never ever told on u before la.. Eeyer.. u're just like Melissa. Everything oso tell. At least I forgave u la, all those other times u told on me. I gave u damn a lot of chances oredi u know.. why la liddat. She told me you're "traumatised". Pls la.. u're the one that wanted a reaction out of me, right? Not happy meh u got a reaction? Either way oso u not happy right. If i brush u off, u not happy. I respond oso u not happy. Then how?? Fucker man I tell u.. real fucker. And she told me u're traumatised becos i did those things AFTER u apologized. Bullshit la. u know i did it before. when u came home n apologized u KNOW i didn't leave my room at all. so how can i fucking do it after u apologized. Come on la.. i always thought u were smarter than that. use ur brain a bit, can? oh wait. it's full of dave. can't think of any other fucking things. ARGHH~!!! u know what? yesterday.. i wasn't mad at u. i was annoyed cos u wanted to pick a fight. this morning at 9 sumthing when i was abt to go to sleep n i got that call from her.. i was pissed. n i still am. fucking betrayal. I'm not saying sorry for something that u wanted la, pls.
Aiyerr.... I'm angryyy... =( I dun like..
Why burn your bridges when you can blow them up?
AHAHHAHA... is that supposed to be something comforting?
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Not me. Big sis is.
But it felt nice to break something that wasn't mine. I'm contented.
Pity she took my house keys though.. But then again, I've already planned my revenge. *wink*. Tee hee! I must say this is quite fun. Pity I have to wait to execute me plans.. sighh.. hope i dun get impatient
11.13pm
edit:// I love my food. I wonder if I stop taking actual solid foods, will it get my point across? Or will I die of hunger beforehand?
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Eh~!! Check out Ame's June 26th post.. Ahahha... the houses are scarily similar. and we all did it at different times without seeing each others. RAHAHA!
My mum always used to say that I wasn't very good at picking the right friends. I never believed her. Six years down the track, I finally do.
"Sorry, there are no secrets between us"
WTF.. If i confided something in u, it's cos I trusted u to keep it to urself. Not blab about it to ur fren because "there are no secrets between us". Eeyer.. i feel like stranging myself. So what am I supposed to do now? Make sure that my fren's friends don't know any of my other friends before i make friends with them? Wah laoo... complicated siaa.. I give up man.. I suck at making friends.. Eeyerr u hear me? EEYERRR~!!
And I love Initial D. The movie that is.
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Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes. -->eh i like good looking guys too, kay? good looking is an added bonus
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you meet that person.
The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love. -->then why do i have so many ex's??? WTH!!
Your views on education
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.
What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.
Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.
The real you
Here is the analysis:
1. You are a very serious person. You tend to be quiet and well behaved, and you don't have a great deal of self-confidence. You prefer to be alone rather than with friends and that could make you a little less interesting to certain types of guys. You are very attractive in an individual kind of way, and this means it can take people a little while to get to like you.
2. You don't really care about other people's feelings. You do things the way you want and usually think only about yourself. You are easy-going and love to have fun, but you can be irresponsible as well. You are not keen on serious discussions because they can make you remember that life isn't always about parties.
3. You are a bright, cheerful and bubbly person. You are thoughtful and considerate, and like to have fun. Everybody feels comfortable around you because of your pleasant nature. When you walk into a room, people's eyes are likely to be drawn to you because of your charm.
4. Guys see you as being a thinker and a careful person. They will be really attracted to this quality in you, but you need to learn to speak your mind, otherwise people will find you too shy and quiet. Learn to relax and lighten up--it's okay to have fun sometimes. When you learn to develop your fun-loving side, guys are going to flock to your side.
5. Your boyfriend believes that you are a strong and independent person. Your confidence and cheerfulness make you an attractive person to be around, but sometimes you need to pay more attention to what other people, including your boyfriend, are thinking.
I must say i disagree with a lot of the things in 'the real you' section..
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My tears have stopped n my heart hasn't gone cold. Good, isn't it? =D Though I may not understand, there are times when I know I don't want to understand. At times I don't want to know the situation cos it might make it worse. For now, I'm multi contented. I'm happy.
Been out a lot this week since exam's ended. Officially broke. Didn't spend a cent yesterday though at Full Moon. HAhaha.. made full use of my drink cards plus good KL frens offering to buy me drinks. YAY~!! Thankfully no publicity tonight. But no Initial D either.. *sob* But Full Moon was great! Sis's frens all came and it was a fun night but pity mambo only played for like 30 mins which really sucked. Need to talk to King abt that. Nvm nvm.. LUSH will be even better, I'm sure. You hear me, people? LUSH WILL BE EVEN BETTER~!!. Therefore everyone should come.. $15 if u buy a ticket from meee. Sexual RnB. HAH! What's that? I dunno.. but the place sounds good. I'm gonna go check it out first on Sunday.
Ah.. the strangers u meet when u go out clubbing. Guys are funny. haha! heeeeee =D. u can tell i'm happy, can't u? Oh n went i got dropped off home, there was a guy who kept the door open for me. Apparently he'd been to Loft. Damn.. i should have asked him to come to LUSH. He's here on holidays. Lives in Brisbane.. ARGHH.. dammit. Opportunity wasted. I shall maildrop. I think i know which unit he's currently staying at. *tee hee*
and i like talking to Lina (sis's fren, sort of). She's funny. I intro'd her to Leona last night. They went to Trinity together. Small world. n we're sharing secrets. AHhaha.. found out stuff i'm gonna pretend i didn't know.
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Fuck the tears. I promised I wouldn't let myself feel it. Absolutely pointless.
Just fuck it. It happened oredi la. Nothing changes it. So i should stop crying. Keep telling myself I shouldn't let myself feel it cos it's not the first time n it won't be the last.
But i can't help it.
n nick's leaving tomorrow. oh wait, today. n all of a sudden i feel so alone
Jennifer left this place at 1:39 AM | 2 comments
No girl how can you say that you are feeling. you still got friends who thinks of your. dont feel so down. not sure what the whole matter is about but hey think will get better for u. hahah. i hope anywayz.
peace out.
RAH! I know who u are...~!! Ahahhaa.. only one person i know speaks like that =P hehehe..
n thank u, it's all okay liao. i feel better oredi =D
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How to face them now, you tell me? Fuck la.
*sighh* after a fcuking hot shower n scalding off all emotions, equipped with my mask, i'm finally ready to go out n conquer the world. or try to anyway
Jennifer left this place at 10:03 PM | 0 comments
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Hurhh.. i think i fucked up again. Twice in the last 24 hrs. Oops. Not setting a good record for myself.
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Since it's Tuesday already n exactly a week before LUSH, here's the ad!
Gavin>> Wanna go to Full Moon AND Lush? Hehehhee.. =D You know u want to... Ahahha~!!
Mention 'Jennifer' for guestlist. Call/SMS 0433 548 697 to arrange freelist, for more info or for Full Moon tix (look 2 or 3 posts below).
Aiks i'm starting to sound like adel n leona n wyn. Crap.
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I'm so happyy.. Hehehe.. been happy all last night n today =D
But I'm not telling why HAHAHA. Happinesssss
Today:
"You wanna come arcade with us for awhile or not? Or u going home?"
Inside me - "yes! i want~!!"
What came out - "going home.."
*smiles* heheheh 'jual mahal' a bit marr
I watched Ju-On at 5.30 this morning. Grrr.. blardee Nick. After that cannot sleep at first. Kaoz. somemore so near the window.. terrified got things suddenly appear coming for me. *blink blink*
n now it's back to studying for my last paper. spent three nights on it so far. nothing has registered. ergo i cannot answer a single question. i'm getting all my calculations wrong too. by a lot. in other words i'm gonna fail this paper. *sob* so scaryyy...
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ArgHH~!! Cannot sleep.. Nobody online somemore.. n the one person online that I would enjoy talking to wants to be left alone. So how?!?!? SIANNNNN
Today's Forecast
Even in your grubby errand-running clothes, you're undeniably appealing. Yes, they're looking at you, so don't just stand there -- smile and say hi. Make the world a nicer place, one person at a time.
The Bottom Line
You're full of raw power and charisma right now -- which explains the adoring fans.
In Detail
No one can remake, reinvent and redo themselves quite like you can. You're the Madonna of the zodiac. You don't need all those fussy costumes and wigs for your transformations, either (although those can be quite a lot of fun). Right now, especially, you've got a really big change up your sleeve. No need to tell anyone about it just quite yet, though. If there's one thing you love more than remaking yourself, it's a good secret.
5 stars for attitude, 5 for love but more importantly, 5 for money. WHAT UTTER BULLSHIT LA. ALL THREE THINGS OSO NON-EXISTENT KAYYY?
Jennifer left this place at 3:49 AM | 2 comments
*lol*
i was online last night and the online world was so dead. couldnt sleep till at least 3am.
Heyyy..~!! i should add u or something! ahaha.. that way i'll have company when i stay up late at night n there's no one else around.. =)
Btw are u interested in Full Moon? I'll post the ad for Lush soon. That's the one on the 28th.
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24th June a.k.a the coming Friday. $15 for prepaid tickets and $18 if u buy at the door. So u might as well get it from me, right? *wink* Call me @ 0433 548 697 for tickets. Freelists could potentially be arranged. =)
And I really didn't want to mention this but.. Girls can come in for free without queuing if they turn up in a bikini. In other words, they don't have to buy a ticket. Damn it.
Gavin> Wanna go? =D
Jennifer left this place at 2:52 AM | 0 comments
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Frustrated. Cannot sleep. Cannot stop thinking. I'm taking it harder than I understand why.
So many emotions.
I need to stop feeling them. I want peace. Too much rage. Too much negativity. Aiming to be a better person, a better friend. A more peaceful one. *cross fingers*
I should be happy. I got my ice cream. With someone who hates ice cream. Someone who came along just for me. Cos I wanted. =) I am happy. About that. Yes, I'm happy. But just only that. Other things outweigh it temporarily. FREDOS~!!
Gawd I care for u so much it's nonsensical. It's killing me watching u hurt. Everytime I close my eyes, I see it. I see the pain u try to hide; the pain that I caused indirectly. I never should have said anything.
Jennifer left this place at 6:34 AM | 0 comments
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Tiff and Ame came tonight~!! Muahahha.. so glad they did. Castle was f**king empty at first. Me Leona Nick n frens almost died of boredom. HAH! Castle made a bad impression on Augustine n Ayumi.. so sad.. Ah well, I now have 30 tickets to sell for Full Moon. Erks. Tiff n Ame.. u better be buying from me.. Ahahhaa~!!
On the down side.. I felt relli bad halfway thru the night. I know what I said relli hurt Nick and right now I regret telling him. I didn't realize it would hurt him so much. William made him drink 3 tequila shots in a row to make him forget what I said. Fcuking guilty. I didn't know what to say or do to cheer him up. He wouldn't even drink with me. Fcuking helpless. Thankfully William was there to make it better. *sighh* I'm so sorry, Nick. Believe me. There's so much I want to say and do.. but I'll wait for the right time. Till then, listen to William. You said you would. =)
Aiyahh ruined laa.. I had plans. CBMF! Now cannot oredi.. Eesh~!!
Just moments ago, but now I'm missing the feel of your body close to mine
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KNS!! Soba noodles in some mushroom soup thingy with beef mince in tomato paste.
!@#$%$#$#%@
Jennifer shouldn't be allowed to make dinner. Yech. *spit spit*
But it's okayy I'm going for ice creaammmm~!!! More than makes up for it. n then it's off to castle. Again. First time in ages going clubbing without Tiff. Is weird. Me dun like. *sighh*
Jennifer left this place at 9:21 PM | 0 comments
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It's 6.50am and I'm not asleep yet. My body clock is absolutely screwed. Tiff left me a couple of hours ago.. =) She's my stay up buddy.
And I just tripled my workload. After writing my details on hundred of eNVy's postcard/flyer thingies for the Full Moon Party, I realized that I wrote guestlist instead of tickets. %$#@%!%$#!$# cbmf!! so i sat there n whited out every 'guestlist' written on every postcard, waited for them to dry, and rewrote 'tickets'.
*sighhh* the stupid things i do.
Okay.. I'm tired after all that hard work. Mail drop from FMP tomorrow. Lush will have to wait. I haven't written on those cards yet. Nyeknyek. thankfully no street promotion or postering for me =D. I'll scan the postcards up. Maybe tomorrow. Nitey nite! It's about time, ain't it?
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What's with me n nick, i hear them ask. Happily enuff, absolutely nothing. We're friends and it's great being friends with him. He worries about me and I like that. I mean, it's sweet of him even though i think its unnecessary. Besides, he's told me things abt himself that he hasn't told many others and for that I'm happy. He reckons I'll blackmail him one day but no, I'll save it for myself. I like it when he gets personal even though he hates it, cos he can be such a softie. It's relli one of those "tough guy on the outside but real sweet on the inside" cases. My heart goes out to him. So sad.. I don't think many would agree with me on him being such a nice guy. Sometimes I hear others tell me things abt him, but I haven't seen it yet. Maybe he just hasn't shown that side of him to me. But for now, I'm glad to have him as a friend. He's reliable and he's caring. He's sweet. And he would never ditch me. Everything I ever wanted in a friend. And though I haven't shared as much about myself to him as he has to me, I find myself trusting him. He's great company. I think i might miss him while he's gone.
Jennifer left this place at 11:24 PM | 0 comments
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Wah fuck the piercing's bleeding. ahhhh so troublesomeeeee~!!!
And I miss my long-ish hair.. *sob*
Jennifer left this place at 10:46 PM | 0 comments
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Okay... so there goes my weekend.. n supposed study time too. I swear I was only supposed to enjoy Thursday n Friday n start mugging for Maths already.
But instead... this is how it went.
Thursday - Mr & Mrs Smith
Friday - Major hair makeover and Castle
Saturday - Madagascar, steamboat, Publicity
Sunday - Madison's
Now - panic n anxiety =)
I'm going to sleep for a few hours n then I'm going to crap a whole semester of maths into one day. Think I'll make it? I highly doubt so. Told William I'll come look for him to help. Shit.. so screwed. I knew I shouldn't have missed all those lectures.
I'm tired. Exhausted. And I was happy. But there's something bugging me. Well, a couple of things.
Winnie> Call me ASAP. It's important. I need to talk. It's about her.
Jennifer left this place at 6:57 AM | 0 comments
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Okay... there are only 3 hours left to the start of my Bio exam..
And I am not ready.
At all.
I'm so screwed.
At least it's over in 6 hours.
I'm tired.
Crap.. so screwed
Jennifer left this place at 5:52 AM | 1 comments
exams...sighs hate it. ive got a week left of it.
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I'm happyyy...~!!! hehehe..stayed up to study withh Tiff last night.. Come 5am i had enuff so I decided to bake a lemon tart! *tee hee* had to go to 7/11 to get sugar n butter though. And I forgot the grease the tray before lining the pastry in. Oops.. But it turned out really really nice though, taste-wise. Presentation is... okay. I finally finished baking at 9am. Dun ask me why it took so long. I don't know why either. Maybe it was the running back n forth from the comp to the oven n back again. It was a nice night home alone. My neighbour's music wasn't blasting - MINE WAS! Akakaka.. yeah it was a lovely peaceful night. For me that is.
I learnt so much more in one hour last night than I did in the previous 5 nights of studying. Why? Because I finally decided to borrow a textbook at midnight n memorize the whole book. *hics* it's working so much better than my lecture notes.
*cough* I just choked on icing sugar. I like my lemon tart.. yumm.. =)
Sis wanted to give some to Dave. I've been telling ppl that they could try it if it turned out alright. I think it turned out okay, minus the fact that it's really hard to get out of the tray. In most cases the slice starts to break. I got a nice one this time. BUT my point was that I wasn't all that pleased abt giving a slice to Dave but sis went ahead n packed it anyway even though I shared my feelings on it. And that kinda pissed me off. Cos it undermines my opinion. And on top of that, I checked the container that she chucked back into the fridge and turns out she put in a friggin meringue as well~!! I mean.. what's so hard about asking me if it's okay, huh? Eesh. Not as if I would have relli stopped her. She managed to get a nice-looking slice as well, but it's the fact that she doesn't stop to consider what I want that relli annoys me. Anyway I did say I was going to bake another one.. this time greasing the tray. HAH!
Jennifer left this place at 11:51 PM | 0 comments
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Well, if he doesn't want to know about the guys in my life, then what does he really want to know? Do my friendship problems not matter to him just because they happen to be guys? I mean.. so what? All you wanna know about are the girls? What an ass. Seriously la.. I'm a girl okay? My life revolves around girls AND GUYS. and that's something you're just gonna have to face. Maybe you're not used to it cos I went to a girls' school n there weren't any guys around. But things are different now and u know it. And you're gonna have to deal with it. ASS.
edit://He doesn't wanna know. Fuck it. I don't want him to know either. I don't want him to know anything about my life. Are YOU reading this? If you are fuck off. I told u I don't want u here anymore. That's right. Fuck off. I mean it.
Jennifer left this place at 3:05 AM | 0 comments
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Oops.. I f**ked up.
Fell asleep at 2-ish yesterday while trying to memorize Bio stuff.. Somewhere along the lines of working out the Calvin-Benson cycle, I crashed. Which is pretty weird considering I've been sleeping at 5-6am n getting up at 1-2pm since monday. Anyhoo, I was up at 9am this morning with the great intention of studying Bio during the day n working on Chem at night. Hah. Haven't even started yet.. Well I did.. a lil bit. Then I fell asleep again. Jerked awake at 12.30. *sigh* so yes I'm going to start now. Sitting up so that I won't fall asleep. Study till big sis gets home. Then go IKEA!!
Jennifer left this place at 1:54 PM | 0 comments
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Wheeeeeee.....~!!! I LIKE!
and not.
I think it's so cute.. but a bit cramped n complicated.
So how?
11.43pm
edit://Okay.. i attempted making some changes.. But i'm still not satisfied.. Any ideas anyone?
Jennifer left this place at 7:23 PM | 0 comments
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Lalalalalala...
You fulfill my every desire
When I'm with you, you take me higher
You're my aphrodisiac; you're the only one I'm needing
When I go, I'll come back cos there is no way I'm leaving...
Wheeee... almost done with BIO!! Just the last few lectures to go.. and then reworking the 'plants' bit n then I'm all ready for the bio exam. In the meantime.. I'm gonna take a short nap..
Tomorrow I'll finish with Bio, complete the sample exam.. and then can start on Chem!!! Wahhhh this is sooo exciting laaaa.. WTH!!
But for now I'm freakin hungry. Must go eat first.. then can read n sleep. Oh shit tomorrow must get more biscuits. Did i mention I spent 50 bucks the other day purely on sweets, biscuits, chips n chocolate? Kekeke.. i think i overindulged my sweet tooth. Nvm la.. it's so worth it. Keep me going thru the night. Hah.
Jennifer left this place at 5:15 AM | 0 comments
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F**king neighbours. F**king noisy.
Cannot concentrate.
FarKKKKKKK
Jennifer left this place at 1:50 AM | 0 comments
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AJ: Hey.. I heard that u were having lots of fun at castle.. How was it? And you were full on with some guy rite? What was his name.......? Oh edmund rite...
Jenn: Ahaha yah it was a damn fun night la. Too bad Tiff stole my girl so i got edmund instead. Ah well it's no big deal la. I didn't even get his number =) wat abt u?
AJ: Me? Well i don't have nothing.. I was working that nite... And you want edmund's number? I got.. He's my friend from kl.. And my housemate alex's friend..
Jenn: Ahaha! No its okay i'm fine. If he wants to talk to me he can go get my number himself. Did he tell u abt it? So shy la everyone keeps teasing me now.. eesh!
AJ: Well not only him but the whole world knows.. And told me
Jenn: Yeah i know.. everyone knows man. What the hell.. It's damn funny la. You mean he told u as well ar? So so so scandalous! *shy shy*
AJ: Hahaha.. Well glad you enjoyed... He was so drunk that nite... And he can't really remember that nite... Now even iris know...
Jenn: Yeah ler so many people had too much to drink. That's what made it so fun la. I'm glad iris knows. I'm sure she has a lot to say. Oh how was immigration?
AJ: Bad.. I told you already rite...
Jenn: Nope I haven't spoken to u since last tuesday. I figured i wasn't all that important in ur life. nvm la not to say we were all that close or anything. Ahaha okay la sorry la sorry la.. Didnt really mean to bring that up. But no, honestly kay? What happened at immigration?
AJ: Bad.. They're giving me a chance at all.. So I have to go
Jenn: Oh really? On the 23rd? Shit.. Then how come u working one? Where and since when?
AJ: At castle for techno that nite
Jenn: Huh? Oh my god u were there? Ahaha fuck i din see u. Me n Tiff went there to get a drink! Did u see me?
AJ: No.. But i saw siok
Jenn: Hmm i barely saw siok. Damn funny. Heheh.. Did u have lots of fun? Hey make sure we meet up before u go kay? Still got plenty of time right?
AJ: Well i didn't have fun... Cos i was too high to do anything. And just after work
Jenn: You didn't have fun?! Wah.. ahaha nvm la on the 10th we go la. Drink drink. My treat =D Heheh.. What do u say huh? Yeah yeah yeah?
AJ: When is 10th june
Jenn: Next Friday. Not the coming one but the week after. Cos i have a long break between exams. Gonna party n relax for a while. Come yah?
AJ: ok.. I'll let you know
This fella is damn terrible laa.. Only contact me when he want to rub something in. Ass. *sigh* maybe Tiff was right after all. I mean, I knew she was right. It doesn't stop me from feeling the hurt any less. Aiyah screw it. It doesn't matter! It doesn't matter. The whole situation is fucked up anyway. He's leaving oredi. Gone. Away. No more. If only it were that simple.
Jennifer left this place at 11:43 PM | 0 comments
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