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Life

Tuesday, September 30, 2003

*sigh* sincerely doubt i will be going back to kl at the ends of this year at the rate i'm going *sob* shall try not to think about it too much. Grr...am so mad. Wanna go back! Wanna go back! Wanna go back! Wish i could throw a tantrum like that in real life but I doubt it'd get me anywhere. Sad, sad, sad. No seeing frens. No going to mamak stalls. No sneaking out. Oops, my secret. Heehe...no freedom. that's the main thing. no going out at night. just plain staying home all the way in perth with nowhere to go n no one to talk to cos everyone's asleep. who sleeps at 11 anyway? geez..something i still can't get used to. Dammit. I can choose to keep ranting about this or I can choose to change the topic n save the ranting for later tonight.

Which reminds me. I've sent my comp in for repairs. The damn thing keeps overheating n crashing on me. Well then, guess i've changed the topic. Hah! Anyways, I'm going to the Royal Show later this evening. Well, not relli evening. What's 3pm? Afternoon or evening? It's kinda in between. Too late to be considered afternoon but too early to be considered evening. So when does afternoon end n evening start? Gawd, I must be bored.

Spent the morning talking to my sis. She's depressed. Now I'm depressed too. Did u know that hanging around with a sad person makes u sad too? I'm living proof of it. Interesting...yes... I need to get a life. Except that around here, what is a life? I haven't discovered the true meaning behind the word 'life' yet.

According to The Australian Little Oxford Dictionary:
Life:-
1. capacity for growth, functional activity,and continual change until death
2. living things and their activities
3. duration of thing's existence or ability to function
4. person's state of existence

I have all that, don't i? yet i dun have a life. maybe i'm wrong n i do have a life. Hah, just being dumb. I dun think that little dictionary understands the metaphorical meaning of the term 'life'. Oh well, even dictionaries can be wrong. I shall leave it here n come back when I'm exhausted after the royal show n think of a way to sneak into the office n use my parents' labtop to post an entry. *hyuk* it's a must, seeing as Sui Lin's leaving tomorrow.

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Sunday, September 28, 2003

Interesting, isn't it what people do to get attention or wateva else it is that drives people like that to have a porn show filmed when u're 13. But then again, I kinda respect them for having the guts to go n sell it to the Hale guys. I thought they did it while they were drunk n so would have been utterly ashamed of what they'd done the next morning. Guess I was wrong. n anyway why just have a porn of the three girls? why not include some of the guys, or maybe just one guys to boost it up a little? but i suppose some guys are relli interested to see the lesbian side of things? tell me if i'm wrong. i am really fascinated by this ideology.

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HEADLINES!!!!

The West Australian Saturday Sept 27 front page

The West Australian Saturday Sept 27 front page

Hah~!!

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Saturday, September 27, 2003

Bleh. Tired. Couldn't get up this morning. kekeke... Went out with Vijay, Raena, Angie n some Year 10s last night. Actually I wanted to go out with Jess cos it was her sis's b'day dinner thing n they were eating crab in the city. *yum* slurp.. but i didn't feel very nice about it cos one thing they would be paying for it n also that it was raena's last night in perth b4 she goes back in indonesia n also the minor fact that i was the one who invited angie to come to the city with us. Oops.. Jess says i always do this. invite everyone out n then can't make up my mind as to who i'll actually be going with. Do I? Really? Never realized it before. Anyway, had dinner with Vijay n all the rest. Drank bad iced coffee. Expired 3 months ago (5 June 2003). Yech...sour milk. first time i tasted it. Gross. Told my mum to hassle the restaurant if i got food poisoning. Kekekekek.. Anyway, after dinner with them, Raena n Vijay n all 'em rest were gonna watch a movie but me n angie couldn't go. Then Jess called n said that she saved me some crab n that they were gonna eat chocolate ice cream cake. Wahhhh~!!! That settled it. Me n Angie walked over to where Jess n family were and had our second dinner. Poor Angie (she doesn't eat very much). So full by the time I was finished with my big, big, big slice of cake. They did on purpose. Jess says I'm her family's rubbish bin. Give me whatever they can't finish. Hah. Well at least I get lots of food then.

Got home at 11. Tiredly turned on the dodgy comp only to find that i can't do anything with it anyway. Sadly turned it off n went to bed. Hyuk. Early night for me. Body must have been screaming for sleep cos I din hear my mum knocking on my door the first time(7 am). Only heard her the second time round (7.50). ARGH~!! Late, dammit. Got ready n rushed out to have 5 min breakfast. Into the car by 8am n then we zoomed off to work. Akaka...amusing. Exhausted n sleepy the whole day. Luckily I was doing more than just sitting on my arse in the back office otherwise I would have fallen asleep for sure. Becs n I were having amusing conversations about some PLC girls who were caught making n selling porn films. Horny, eh? Ahahhaa..I think I shall post the newspaper article later. Funny. Hah! Also discussed her sort-of-but-not-quite boyfriend. ???? Anyways, she's having fun tonight. Fren came in n gave her a VIP pass to Metro City (club). Grrr...bitch. So while she's out totally enjoying herself n getting drunk, here I am sitting at home in front on my comp. Was meant to stay over at Jess' house tonight but I think I'll do that tomorrow seeing as Monday's a public hol n my parents are gonna be out. Might as well be out then too.

Btw, got 92% for Accounting test. Same as Jess. AGAIN~!! We always get the same marks especially when we sit next to each other. As if we copied. Heheh.. not that we did of course. But anyways, so much for theory being very very bad, huh? I only lost 2 marks there. Becoming like Steph Seah. Which reminds me. She's gone back to singapore too. *sob* but so has gerald~!!! Flight at 4 this afternoon. Yay...good riddance. Peace for 2 weeks at least. *sigh* what a relaxing holiday. =P

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Last day of skool~!! YAY!!!! Ahahha...fun day today. Lots happened. My comp is playing up again. Dunno wat's wrong but I think it's overheating since I've got a dodgy comp. Useless piece of crap that I paid AUD3000 for. Hmmph. Better call n complain. Get them to fix another fan or something. Anyway, everything doesn't seem to be working at the moment. My site seems dodgy as well. I can't see my tagboard anymore... *sob* where did it go..? Or maybe it's just on my comp. Very annoyed. I can't even log in to the site to see what's up with my board. Says that my nickname or password is invalid but that's just absurd seeing as i use that nickname n password for everything i do. Grrr...I think I shall go fix everything up b4 I talk anymore. Not relli in the mood. I can't even excess Sui Lin's site. Yeah n so I think it's my comp.

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Wednesday, September 24, 2003

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ELAINE..~!!

*muaks* I lurve u darling. Happy 17th b'day!! Shall call u later again to have a little chat. Surprised that I rang u so early? Hehehe...Can't believe it man...we're all growing up n going our separate ways liao.. Scary, u know? Anyways, all the best for ur trials or watever it is that u have today. Lots of luv~!!!!

Elaine n her boyfriend, Wai Soon

Erks..GNT was very bad today. If I had read my sis's assignment n check properly, I would have been able to score it so well. Also made a silly mistake of forgetting to shade in the required region. Grr...was thinking that I'd get back to it after I finish the more important bits but I ran out of time AND I totally forgot about it. *sigh* Hate GNT. HATE HATE HATE!!

Bio quiz on microscopes today. Wonder what kinda questions they're gonna ask. *confused* I think it's something to do with field vision n all that crap, how many cells can fit into the field vision etc etc. Gee...so minor. Wonder why they bother to quiz us on it but oh well, who am I to question them?

Siong Seng n Boon Wy called me from M'sia/Singapore. Still on the phone with them at the moment. That's why I'm still awake at the moment. Not allowed to sleep. They were entertaining me with songs just now. Singing like crazy people. Akaka...now they're discussing Lord of the Rings. Boon Wy's got his Chemistry exam later on today. He's supposed to be studying but I dun think he feels like it seeing as he's been talking to me n Siong Seng since 11 sumthing at night.

GOOD LUCK, BOON WY~!!
Alright, I'm just gonna talk to these two silly people and then I'm off to bed. *sigh* dun get to catch up on sleep tonight. Well, at least tomorrow no tutoring for me. Yay~!! G'nite to the world!!

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Tuesday, September 23, 2003

Okayz, I had about an hour's nap when I got back from school. Doubt that was enough so I shall sleep "early" tonight. Apparentlymy definition of 'early' is different to many other people, seeing that it is after all already 1am. *sigh* oh well. I promised someone I'd wake him up with a phone call right about now. Will let him have a few more mins sleep until I finish my post.

My GNT assignment is completed..~!! Well, sort of... I actually forgot to bring my assignment home but I only had 5 graphs to sketch n a conclusion to write. Doesn't take that long. I did it in an hour. Had to call Jess n get the questions off her so I could do it. Amazing fact of the day: I had to show Steph S. how to draw the polar graph thing. Woo..I feel so smart all of a sudden. Pretty proud of myself but then again I'm not even sure if I did it right. *cross fingers*

Today was a solemn day somehow. All of us seemed a bit silent.. Might have been due to the stormy weather. I was quiet cos I was dead tired..dunno bout the rest. Maybe it was just me? Too tired to notice anything? But anyhow, I'm not that tired anymore.. Only was on the way home from school in the car. LURVE sleeping in the car~!!

Accounting assignment was bad. Yech..well, I think I scored my practical side. Managed to get the figures right, I think. My balance sheet balanced and that's all i care about~!! Theory was VERY VERY BAD. 10 marks on true or false but it was so confusing.... Maybe I'll get 5/10 or sumthing like that. Oh well...doesn't matter now. Already done.
Okayz..GNT check tomorrow..better fix my figures on my assignment which I nicely left in my locker. Biology quiz on plant cells on Wednesday. Yay~!! at least there's not many things in my last week of skool. One assignment n one short quiz. That's it!! Then I can enjoy my 2-week break. Ermmph..which reminds me. We got our English essays on Brides of Christ oredi...The questions are blardee hard. I have no desire whatsoever to answer any of them. Damn. Must find out what techniques were used in the movie. Didn't catch any. *hyuk* =P

Alright.. shall go n make my (very short, I hope) phone call now n hop straight into bed. Need to catch up on sleep. ARGH~! Need to clear my bed before I can hop into it. Grrr... Must rush off n get it done quick then..

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Monday, September 22, 2003

Ermphh...am dead tired.. Have slept a total of 1.5 hrs since last night. This is not good. If I'm dead tired now, what will I be later? Shall not think about that. It's all Kevin's fault.. Grr...was talking to him till 4 sumthing in the morning. Hehe..but then again, I went to bed at 5 n did not sleep till 5.30 (was still working on this site). Alarm rang at 7. Vaguely remember slamming my palm into the clock n entering Sleepland again. Next thing I know, mum is screaming at the door..It's only 7.10am. Well, here I am in skool with gorgeous panda eyes. Ahahah...as usual..maybe it's worse..I can't tell.
Bell about to go..Shall leave now in search of Steph to help change my font. Am desperate. I have now received lots of complaints about it. Well..only 2 so far but still~!!

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Sunday, September 21, 2003

Fell asleep on phone with Gerald last night. Wasn't long though. Optus free time only for 10 mins so I couldn't possibly have slept for more than that. Woke up to the vibrations of the phone. He calling me back. *sigh* Oh well..no harm done. I dun think he realized cos he didn't mention it at all. He continued talking as if everything was fine so yeah.. Grr.. He talked n I listened for 2 hours straight. Shocking.

Steph W. has officially named me an evil twisted person on her site. Wanna see it?

Hah! Steph, I DID IT~!!!! I know now how to do the cool link thing!! Took me a while but I learnt. Yes I do still need ur help. Can't get rid of the pink font...n that's where u come in.. Tee hee..Steph is also an evil, evil person who spent quite some time talking to me earlier but would not teach me how to do the cool name link thing but instead spent her time laughing at me n giving me hugs alternately. Hmmph..EVIL STEPH!! Me having fun here. I like that link thing.. *smirks*

Oh dear....STEPH~!! You haven't helped with a lot of other stuff.. Grr...my site shall remain dodgy until Steph wishes to spare her time to help me out. Hmmph..

Kevin Low has decided to spend his way-too-free time teasing me. He wants a gf with hair around 3 inches past her shoulder. Yay~!!! Joy, I don't qualify.. Well, not yet la at least. Eventually I will, unless I keep cutting my hair. Hmm..interesting concept. Think of the many million hairstyles I'd have by the end of the year. Wow... Ahaha...anyways, Kevin is a "DIRTY, DIRTY BOY!!" All of u who are watching Brides of Christ Episode 2 in school will know what I'm talking about. Sister Philomena to Frances n Bridget ,"YOU DIRTY, DIRTY GIRLS!!!" when she caught them in the bushes. Don't quite get that bit though. Why are they dirty?? Anyone care to explain it to me? I'm so lost.

Alright..neck starting to cramp up from staring at the stupid comp screen since 4.00pm. Shall continue working on this thing later tonight. Yech..which reminds me of my GNT assignment due on Tuesday which I haven't done yet. Oops..forgot that I haven't even read it yet. Akakak...Shall go do something useful for once.

*note: GNT = Geometry & Trigonometry aka BAD BAD BAD MATHS~!!!!*

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Wow wee....changed layout. Looks cool hey? Just got to fix up the links. It's still a bit dodgy at the moment but at least I have such a nice layout.. Tee hee.. Proud of myself~!!

Can't say much at the moment cos Gerald is on the phone at the moment. Has anybody realized that he is kinda boring? I spent the whole night saying, "Mmm..okay" Geez...getting bored n tired. Will update as soon as he gets off the phone. Meanwhile I'm gonna think of what to say later since I'm not actually contributing on the phone. *sigh*

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Saturday, September 20, 2003

Just got back from Av's farewell thing.. It was good. Ate lots. feeling fat now.. Vijayeta's here.. she ate more than me~!! Tee hee.. Btw msg to the world. Never embarass yourself by dropping ur plate of food onto a decent carpet. It does quite large damage to ur social status. Rather embarassing I must say. Hope never ever to do that again. *sigh*.. Met Anna Mulholland and Emma(from Rumba) at Av's place. Che> met Ariana n all em too. Remember them? Anyways, it was good fun. Vi's staying over tonight. She's watching over as I type my thoughts to the whole world. Shall be careful then? Just in case I type the wrong thing about her n she smacks me right over the back of my head. =P

Steph W. mentioned me in her blog.~!!! Congrats to me~!! I mentioned her lots in the past couple of days n she mentioned me only once? Only to say that I had a blog. 9 words about me. Hmmph..nice indeed.. Gave her David Eddings book. Must remember to scan book out otherwise book considered missing in store. Hehz..must pay for it too. Forgot about that. Shall do it when i have cash.
Gonna spend time figuring out layouts. Shall have something more interesting soon. Dunno when soon is but will do soon. Might go out with Steph S. and all em rest tomorrow but might have to work? Will see when I get up in the morning. Depending on what mood mum is in.. Could turn out quite nasty. Last minute changes..she hates them.

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Friday, September 19, 2003

Today was an alright day. Nothing amazing happened. Has anybody realized that Steph S. is incredibly lazy? Amazing creature; wonder where she came from. Today at recess she was saying how she had to study for her Geog test that she was having after recess, so I asked her to go get her book. "Dowan la..it's too difficult..first u gotta walk all the way there and then u gotta walk all the way down the so-very-steep stairs..and then u gotta walk over the grass which is such rocky, treacherous terrain...n then have to walk all the way to the locker. When u reach the locker then u gotta turn the combination of the lock n sometimes i gotta do it 3 times b4 i can open it. n then when it's open i gotta search thru all my stuff to find my notes n when i find it i gotta walk all the way back across the treacherous grass again. Then u gotta walk up the so-very-steep stairs..n this time u're walking UP so it's even more work...so no i dun think i will go n get it" n this kinda went on for a while until 10.45am. I kept pushing her to get her book but her final answer, "No la it's alright. It's only 5 mins more to the bell anyway. Might as well wait for the bell n then I shall go get my book." ???? Lazy brat...

Finally talked to Tera..talking right now. She send me pics of her.. Wish I could show it to the world..but haven't linked yet. will show off as soon as i link my site up properly. ASAP i hope. but anyways...one of the pics got a relli cute girl..n i mean cute, k? not as in hot chick..but cute adorable. Tera looks relli good now. Getting prettier as the years pass. Me jealous. Hehhehe...

Avanita's farewell party is tomorrow... Gonna miss her heaps. No more confidante around for me to bitch to. Hmmph~ everyone deserting me. Grr...Bought farewell present for Av..it's quite cool. Just wish it wasn't gold..(it's a keychain - gold with a silver engraved middle "Friends Always" n also a bracelet with her name on it. Childish but nice) Also bought one of those big big huge cards..It's not relli that big la..but big enough..the length of one long ruler. 30cm? About there. Gonna get all the St Mary-ians to sign it. Farewell to Av. We'll miss u lots. She better keep in touch or I'll smack her so bad. Pity she's going so far (UK). *sigh*

The world is actually a really small place. Just found out that an old friend of mine, Chun Min, is friends with Sui Lin's friend. Just saw his pic on her(Jolyne) site. Oooh...now things are getting interesting.. Hah..gtg mum just told me off. It's late

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Thursday, September 18, 2003

Just looked at Sui Lin's site. Was looking thru her pics. Damn; made me miss home.. *sigh* I wonder why I can't get over the fact that I'm here n that I'm never gonna go back. I mean, it is too late after all..no point going back now. I'd just have to study longer years. But still...I'll always feel the urge to go back.. *sigh* *sigh* *sigh*. You can tell I'm getting depressed. Not good..started when I started this site. Coincidence? Letting out these feelings made me think about it more maybe?

ARGH~!! Can't stand feeling this way. Just ruins everything. *sigh* Heheh...another one. Wonder how many I'll have by the end of this post. =P Anyways, finally talked to Steph W. about my site. She's agreed to help me~!! Even gave me some ideas already. But she went offline halfway talking to me. Guess she had to go. So anyway I'll talk to her more tomorrow. She was away today at some Lit thing. Underline LIT..yeah she's a smartarse. Steph S. too. All Stephs' are smartarses? Hmmph...wish I was a Steph now. That'd just be dodgy. Stephanie Loh. Tee hee...weird..

Kevin Low just msged me. Guess he has no one else to talk to. Not even exactly frens with him. Anyway, he's frens with Mei Keng who's frens with Alvin. Alvin me ex...starting to think bad thoughts about him now. Grrr~... Kevin reminded me; it's not my fault. Had no desire to remember the idiot whatsoever~!! *sigh* Change topic?

Right..what now? Listening to good song. Liz Phair - Why can't I? Thinking of Alvin; but not bad thoughts.. They're more nostalgic thoughts.. Solemn..sombre...make me cry~!! *sob* =~( Ahahah...no...just kidding. Not crying..yet. Might do some other time. No time at the moment. Better things to do.
GTG..mum asking me to clean my room..as usual... *sigh* <-- last one for tonight. TTFN people...

Why Can't I
get a load of me get a load of you
walking down the street and i hardly know you
it's just like we were meant to be
holding hands with you when we're out at night
got a girlfriend you say it isn't right
and i've got someone waiting too
what it is its just the beginning
we're already wet and we're gonna go swimming
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you
why can't i speak whenever i talk about you
it's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it
so tell me
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you
whenever i think about you
whenever i think about you
whenever i think about you
isn't this the best part of breaking up
finding someone else you can't get enough of
someone who wants to be with you too
it's an itch we know we are gonna scratch
gonna take a while for this egg to hatch
but wouldn't it be beautiful
here we go we're at the beginning
we haven't fucked yet but my head's spinning
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you
why can't i speak whenever i talk about you
it's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it
so tell me
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you
high enough for you to make me wonder, where it's going
high enough for you to pull me under
something's growing out of this that we can't control
baby im dying
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you
why can't i speak whenever i talk about you
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you
why can't i speak whenever i talk about you
it's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it
so tell me
why can't i breathe whenever i think about you
whenever i think about you
whenever i think about you
whenever i think about you
whenever i think about you

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Wednesday, September 17, 2003

Hello, it's me at skool. Can u believe it? I'm spending my lunchtime in the iT centre~!!!!! AMAZING.....

Oh guess what?!??! I got my GNT results back oredi... I got 79%... Woah.....power yeah?? Unfortunately Jess got 86% and Steph Seah the crazy cow got 93%. So much for "shittifying" her test. Incredible these people with weird-working minds. How on earth does someone get 93% for a GNT test?!?!??! That's just wrong, u know.... Oh any by the way Steph Seah is mad at me cos I dun have a whole paragraph on her in my blog. Geez...sad case. So that's why I'm dedicating this whole entire paragraph on her. Well the only problem is that Steph doesn't exactly say much so...I also dun quite know what to say about her. Yesterday at Aths we were trying to have a decent conversation with Steph. You should have seen it. All of us wrote at least 3-4 lines and Steph replies with a single word OR A DRAWING~!!! ??? What the heck? She's kinda strange, hey? Ahahah...sorry Steph just being honest. You did want a whole paragraph on u, right? Well, I take it this paragraph is enough for u? I'm kinda running out of things to say already. So maybe some other time.

Right; well now on to Jess. She wants a paragraph on her too... What's with these people? They want to be famous? Oh well...here goes... Hmm....there's nothing much to say about Jess.. Heheh...sorry Jess. Oh crap...Jess and the others just got chased out of the IT Centre.. They're not allowed to be in here if they're not doing anything. So yeah she's left me behind. Perhaps I should get going too? I'm kinda lonely here on my own. I showed Jess Sui Lin's site about the English University research thing. She said it was kinda cool too. That's great; I was starting to think that I was kinda lame. Me on my own thinking it was cool. Well now I know I'm not the only one. If I'm lame then Jess is too... YAY~!! Hehehe...Jess are u ready to kill me now? Maybe now u're thinking that u shouldn't have asked for a paragraph on u, hey? Tee hee..oh well...your paragraph is done. I'll write more later. Tata...~!!

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Omigod...Just visited the site that Jerilyn asked ppl to visit. http://www.geocities.com/cabucojuice/sad.htm. Dammit such a sad story... Music was sad too...from final fantasy X. *sob*~ tears in my eyes at the end... Honest~!! Argh...can't stand it..made me feel so emotional. I'll probably become sad everytime I think about it. =~(

Anyways, let's try moving on to a not so sad topic. Interschool Aths was alright. I was sitting in the sun for the first half of the day. Ended up with a major headache AND losing my voice AGAIN~!! Well, not entirely but my voice is dodgier than it was. Not all gone but close. At least I can still talk. Hah I love my voice. Can't get enough of it since I lost it when I got sick. Hehehe...kinda vain, I know but u gotta appreciate the things u have, right? =P Nah, I'm just kidding... I can hear Jess going ,"Yeah right..."

I asked Steph to help me with my site already... She said she'd try to come online tonight. But I dun think she could. I tried calling her house earlier but there was no answer. Maybe out for dinner? Who knows.. Anyway, I guess it can wait. It's just that the layout of this current page is annoying the hell out of me. It's just so plain and uninteresting. But I'm not exactly the smartest computer person alive so I guess I can't be picky. Even starting this site was kinda good for me so better be thankful that I KNOW how to start it. Hehehhe...

Oh yeah...important item of the day. Happened first thing this morning. I got up late (8.00; I'm meant to get up at 7) this morning cos my eyes were an hour behind time. Oh let's face it; I read the clock wrong. My mum woke me up at 7.40am but I saw 6.40am and was wondering why she was waking me up so blardee early in the morning. Anyway when I realized that it was 8 i jumped straught out of bed n ran to get ready. Went for breakfast and made a joking comment to my mum about me waking up late. She got all cranky with me but I didn't mention it then. Since I wasn't gonna be able to order lunch today, I asked my mum if she had any lunch for me. Know what her reply was? "Why would u assume that I'd know that I have to make lunch for u today?!?!?" And she did this in a very indecent tone. Che> u know what I mean. Now it's my turn to get annoyed and so I was like," woah, did u n Jim(my stepdad) have a fight or something this morning? I mean, c'mon all i did was make a joke n ask u a question n mind u, i did all this quite nicely. Wasn't rude about it or anything." And she says, "NO I DIDN'T HAVE A FIGHT WITH JIM! I'M JUST SO FED-UP OF YOU BEING SO UNGRATEFUL ABOUT THE THINGS THAT I DO FOR YOU!!!!" That leaves me with a "???" but oh well...Probably PMSing or going through menopause. Really annoying. Well, only a year to go and then THAT'S IT~!! Can't wait to leave. Hate it here. Must go as soon as I can. Otherwise things could go bad. *sigh~*

jenn: i know mag/gwen half my life. my mom "left" when i was 13, my beginnign of my adolescent life. of coz i turned to my frds for support. obviously, i dun turn to my dad! i nv stayed with him til i was 15! i been thr up n down w these 2 gals, naturally i turned to them. even tho we are far away, the distance dont really bother us, when there's net, phone, letters and all. n i state that statement coz overall, it happened in sch n mag, gwen n mi usually hang out together, same case s j, meli n i. same scenario. so of coz i so wished they were in my sch, or i was w them again. it's a thought, a wish. yea. i do appreciate u, but it's juz hard tryin got start all over again, diggin up things deep within and make a close f/ship. not @ this point, where i'm so busy n i cant even think of frds, except those in sg. we juz been thr so much, it's like one look on my side, and they know wad's wrong. it's a bond that we made over 5-6 yrs. so dun compare urself, coz every1 is different. i dont mean to blog it publicly, but i dunno where to blog it. so yea. here. sorry.
That was from jerilyn. We were talking about frenships n confiding in each other. There was once when she was calling out in rage about never having someone to confide in. So I said that I'd always be there for her n it's whether she chooses to call out to me or not. A few days later she had a fight with her mum n she said,"where the hell r u maggy/gwen?" and i said,"see what i mean?" so that was her response. I can kinda understand la cos that's sort of how I feel here as well. There are times when I wish that I had someone to confide in...and the funny thing is that there are lots of ppl around for me to confide in.. It's whether I choose to do so or not. But it's always easier to confide in someone who's had history with u; someone u've known your entire life or most of it anyway. I would always rather confide in Elaine n Tera than Jess or Angie. It's sort of understandable cos I've only known Jess for 2.5 years..and I've known Elaine around 7 years oredi. Tera's different. Tera's easy to confide in but there are times when she doesn't understand certain things n that's the way I feel with Jess as well. What I want to confide I don't think she'd understand. She seems too carefree. Our worlds are so different I wonder how we came to be friends. Maybe cos there was no one else?

*sigh* now me being pessimistic again.. I shall stop. My post for today getting kinda long anyway. I still have the music from the story I was reading playing. Maybe that's why kinda emotional at the moment. Alright, I'm gonna stop now before I think up of more problems to make me more depressed....

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Tuesday, September 16, 2003

GNT test was alright...expected it to be way much much worse. I guess I'll pass which is an improvement in itself. Rather disappointing though. I didn't relli want the test to be today cos I wanted to have a tutoring session first. I dun think my tutor is much good anyway. He doesn't give me things to work on; just things that I've worked on that I dun understand. That's not how I'm used to tutors working. I hope I didn't do too badly though. I know I stuffed up some questions oredi but Jess, Steph Seah and me and some other gnt students were comparing some answers as we were walking to assembly today and it seems i got SOME right so I guess it can't be all that bad.

I gave Steph Wong part of her present already. It's one of those jewellery boxes thing which is painted with hearts. really nice; i kinda liked it myself. ahaha...thought of keeping it but i needed something to give her so yeah... I need to get her present off angie which is only possible on thursday since sean has it n he's busy these few days. And i also need to get her the new david eddings book. Gotta ask mum to bring it back tomorrow. Kinda expensive but it's a good present...

Interschool Aths tomorrow...no subjects again. What fun. Go back to school for a day n then spend the next day cheering n losing my voice again after I just got it back. I vow not to cheer tomorrow. But knowing I'll probably overdo myself and make myself so hoarse. So I've been a good girl. I bought a whole set of Ribena cartons which I'm gonna drink tomorrow. Hehehe...but I bought chips as well. Probably shouldn't be eating it since I'm still coughing but oh well... who cares yeah?

I smsed Steph Wong just now asking her to help me with my blog. Wanna change lots of stuff... Can't stand the current layout. It's driving me crazy.. Asked her to come online but got no reply from her. Had to succumb to asking Gavin (sis's ex) about how to start. He's not much help but he let me see his friend's site. Good stuff on it. She's an interesting person. Funny that...Frens we make - he's so full of crap, n she's so full of facts. I suppose they create some sort of balance?

Gerald called today.. Hmmph after so long. Was starting to enjoy the peace.. If only it lasted. *sigh* oh well I suppose good things can't last ALL the time. But it's been a very peaceful n relaxing 2 weeks away from him. I suppose maybe I'd be able to tolerate him for a while again after the break. Angie is bugging me. She keeps teasing me about him so me n Jess have backfired it on her. Now we tease her about him, saying that she keeps bringing his name up cos she's interested in him. Childish, i know, but what can u do when it comes down to Angie?

Oh yah, going back to Gavin's fren's site. It was kinda cool. Her latest entry was about this research that an English University performed. Something about how it doesn't matter if u spell things wrong as long as the first n last character of a word is in the right place. The others can be a total mess n we'd still be able to read it cos we dun read each character on its own but the whole word. It's an interesting thing to know. I won't type out what she said cos that'd just be copyright but she actually typed the whole paragraph out in typo n i could still read it so that was what i found interesting...

Alright, I have to go already. Mum buggin me to get some rest seeing as I'm still sick. *sigh* dunno whether it's a good thing to be sick or not. Lots of advantages - u get to miss skool and u're constantly pampered. Disadvantage - everyone always forces u to get more rest. it's kinda boring...Heheheh...

PS: Tera - SMS me the next time u're online. Haven't spoken to u in a while. I'll try to come if u're on though no guarantees. Feel like talking. See ya soon. Missing u lots

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Monday, September 15, 2003

Hello, first time blogging. Kinda nervous somehow, as if I'm talking to you. Which is kinda weird. Anyway, don't mind me.

Steph Wong had her birthday party yesterday. I wanted to go but still kinda sick. Doubt mummy would have allowed me to go anyway. It was a stayover thing until 11 this morning. What was I doing at 11 this morning? Still sleeping. Akakak...as usual.

Thought about Elaine and Tera lots today. Thought about Khai Yeing too. Strange yeah? Missed them all. Not so much Khai Yeing la...but the rest of them. Elaine no time for internet liao. So her email is invalid at the moment. Don't know what's going on with her now that she's got a bf. Can't call her cos I got no voice at the moment. Dun relli wanna sound funny over the phone. Miss Tera; haven't spoken to her in a long time. We always have bad timing. I come n she has to go and vice-versa. *sigh*
Then I thought about KY; thinking how we in the same place yet until now we still haven't go out with each other yet. Ahahah...so lazy..
Adrian's hairstyle is quite bad now, I must say. Saw him when I went to the city one Sunday. I think he got dreadlocks or something. Couldn't quite see from the distance. I didn't have specs or contacts on but his hair was puffy and he looked really ugly. All u girls out there who used to like him or still do, forget it. He's hell ugly now.

Not really ready for school yet. Don't feel like going after a whole week off. Actually more like 2 weeks off, including camp. But I think I've got a GNT test on tomorrow. More reason not to go to school. But I guess I should get it over n done with.

Angie just called. She said that she forgot to bring Steph's present back with her. Oh no..~!! Oh well, I'll figure out something else to give Steph and when I get it on Thursday I'll just give it to her as well. She can have lots of presents.

Gotta go, gonna make call. Gotta wish someone really important a happy birthday. No it's not Steph.

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